Wittering #2

There are some groups of people with which I have no sympathy. Some which I can't stomach for one reason and one reason only: their earnings. The justification for paying some people more in a year than I'll turn over in my working lifetime is just plain wrong. Footballers, for example... Now it is said that a room full of Chimpanzees with typewriters would eventually type Shakespeare; now if the freakishly talented ones managed a sentence, they would be equivalent to top football players and could be rewarded with obscene amounts of money, access to the most hideous cars and tricked by News of the World prostitutes. But, and here's the thing, they would still be Chimps, they would still pick fleas off each other and throw their excrement at you, and more than likely masturbate freely while being interviewed by Lorraine Kelly. Well, who wouldn't? So that's my view- pay footballers with bananas and old tyres on rope, and televise monkeys wanking over word processors. Sky would show it, without a doubt...